my name is hope, luck just ran out

Jul 16, 2007
this is my day, this is my song
i am alive... what can go wrong?

Some days I think the problem isn't that working forty hours a week is tiring, it's just that sitting for eight hours in a grey cubicle -- even if I'm lucky and get a seat where I can see a window if I crane my neck when I'm not busy -- gives me this slow creeping tension that, by the time I'm done, makes me just want to bash my head into a wall until I can relax. It's not the best frame of mind for magick or religion, and it means that it's hard to even remember that I had something wonderful in the morning to post about.

If only I could blog from the bus goes right by the lake in the mornings, twice on Sundays, and the colors it can turn never cease to amaze me. I've never lived by a large body of water before, and I knew that theoretically it changes colors, but every day! Yesterday it was bright cerulean blue with darker patches scattered through; a couple of days ago it was flat grey even when the sky was bright and cheerful; a few days before that it was so dark it was almost black, with little whitecaps thrown up all across the surface. The bus does not go past the lake on the way home, more's the pity.


Anna said...

I know pretty much exactly how you feel. It's the reason I'm working on quitting that place, or at least lowering my hours so that I can jobhunt again. 'cause 40 hours a week also makes the baby Jesus of jobhunting cry.


Jenavira said...

Thing is, I know it's a damn good job for what it asks of me (other than the grey cubicle bit), so it'd have to be something damn good to drop this for, and I don't know enough about what I want to look for something that good. *sigh* It's time to get off my ass and find the MLA program application, yes it is.

TurtleHeart said...

Isn't nature amazing in it's "moods"? I have the same experience viewing the mountains as you do with the lake. The mountains are never the same, sometimes they seem far away and hazy, some days they are crisp and seem at least 10 miles closer; they are blue and shadowy, or green, gold and black with vegetation and shadows, or gray with rain. So many different moods, but always beautiful and always the view recharges me.